"So, I take Hgwy 12, after
I’ve gone past New Buffalo, Michigan?" Willow
asked.
"Yep, follow it for about 18
miles. You’ll pass Three Oaks, then Galien, then about another 6
miles you’ll see a little convenience store and fruit stand on the
right side. That’s Bakertown Road. Take a left there, then another
left on Elm Valley Road in about 2-3 miles, then you come to a stop.
You can either go left or right. Go right for about 100 feet; you’ll
see the sign for Fuller’s Resort on the left side. Take that road
for about a mile, it deadends right at the resort. It’s the second
cabin you come to, right on the lake.
It’s a very nice place, nice
people, mostly seasonal campers who own big trailers, and some
people who just come up for a few days at a time. Owners have had
this resort for almost 70 years, got the grandkids running it these
days. Or is it the great-grandkids? I can’t remember. All I know, is
that when I want some real peace and quiet, this is the place I go
to. Need to go to. I traveled a lot when I was younger, been out
west, out east, overseas, and every place in-between. Lovely,
stunning, beautiful places, but you know what? This place,
practically in my own back yard, is what I always keep coming back
to."
"I’m sold!" Dawn said,
smiling.
"Here’s the keys for the cabin
and the car," he said, handing them to Dawn.
"You sure about this?" Buffy
asked.
"Yeah, my cousin and I are
coming up there in a about 3 weeks, I was gonna sell him this car
anyway when he went back home, so I’ll just give it to him there. He
doesn’t need it much here, anyway. If he does, he can just drive me
to work someday."
"Thanks Leroy. For Everything.
Oh, tell Amelia thanks, too. Oh, before I forget, here’s her
apartment key."
"Glad you remembered that, or
it’s my hide she’d have tanned," Leroy said.
Dawn and Willow were walking
ahead with William between them. Each of them had an
arm.
"William will be able to get
some good rest up there, before you take him back to California,
right?"
"Yeah, California," Buffy
said, "you said, there’s no big, tall buildings there and it’s a
small town?"
"Yeah, lots of Seven-Day
Adventists in the area, lots of Amish not too far away, and as for
the town of Buchanan? It’s like Mayberry. Probably even have Andy
and Barney there, too," Leroy said, "don’t worry, nobody ever gonna
think to look for William there," he said,
whispering.
Buffy got into the backseat
with William, as Dawn got behind the wheel and Willow took the front
passenger side.
"Bye y’all. William, you take
care of the ladies, alright?"
"Alright," William answered
without emotion, as he leaned against Buffy.
Dawn backed up the 2000
Firebird and waved, as she took the narrow road back to the main
street.
6:05am
The sun had come up half an
hour ago, as Dawn finally pulled into the carport of Cabin 2 at
Fuller's Resort.
Buffy and William had fallen
asleep leaning up against one another, and even Willow had drifted
off to sleep.
"Old people," Dawn said,
amusing herself.
"Hey guys, we’re here!" Dawn
said.
Slowly they all opened their
eyes. They got out of the car and Dawn used the key to open the
cabin door.
"This is great," Willow
said, as they walked into a small porch, which contained small white
painted cabinets and a shelf for storing outdoor items. She opened
the door that led directly to the kitchen. Straight ahead was a
small bathroom, to the right and through the kitchen, was a large
dining room/living room. The room had a couch, a couple of chairs,
on the right wall, a television set, an oval, wooded dining table
with 4 chairs, and a small, old fashioned gas furnace one could
light for warmth, if needed, on the left wall, which also had
windows. On either side of the couch, were two bedrooms. The main
room then opened up into the front room, which contained another bed
out in the open. Underneath wall to wall windows, which overlooked
the lake, was another couch and a chair. To the left was a sliding
glass door, which opened up onto a large 12' x 25'
deck.
"Oooh, squealed Dawn, as she
opened the sliding door and stepped outside.
"It’s lovely," Buffy said,
following, as she looked out at the calm water. The lake looked to
be surrounded by trees; big pine, and oaks, elms, and maples, except
when she looked closely she could see that there were lots of houses
on the other side of the lake. On this side, the resort had a roped
in swimming area, a dock for fishing, and paddleboats, water-bikes,
rowboats, and canoes, all for the renting. There was also a small
store for basic camping necessities and treats.
William had followed Buffy to
the door, but didn’t step out onto the deck. She looked back at him,
then turned to Willow and Dawn.
"I think I’ve got to get
William into bed for a decent sleep," she said quietly to them,
"this has been terribly hard on him. On all of us. It seems like
days since I went to get Dr. Turner from the golf course, but it’s
only been, what? Twelve, fourteen hours ago? And how long ago did we
leave Chicago? Three hours ago? Seems like days. So…we’re turning
in, I think we may sleep for the next 24 hours.
"Okay, Buffy, you guys get
some sleep. What about you Dawn?" Willow asked.
"I could use a couple of hours
myself, then guess we should find out where to buy some food if
we’re staying for a while. I’ll take the bed out here," Dawn said,
pointing to the bed in the front room, "you can have one of the
bedrooms, if that’s okay with you."
"Yeah, that’d be great,"
Willow said, "think I’ll get a little shut-eye, too. Wake me up when
you get up Dawn. Or if I wake first, I’ll get you up and we’ll go
get some food."
"Maybe I should sleep out here
with Dawn, I don’t know if…maybe he’ll feel uncomfortable with me
sleeping there with him," Buffy said, shrugging.
"Well, he’s definitely
clinging to you, Buffy, ever since we got him out, so that may not
be a problem," Dawn said.
"I guess you’re right Dawn, I
just didn’t want to make him feel…like he has to ‘sleep’ with me. To
him, I’m still a stranger. Well, more or less."
"You guys looked pretty
UN-stranger like, when we got to the basement at the hospital,"
Willow said, giving Buffy a knowing look.
Dawn looked at her
questioningly.
"We were kissing," she said,
"Dr. Polydefkis stopped her right in the hall in front of William’s
room and was saying these gross things to her. When he heard the
doctor’s voice he started to freak out, so I thought I’d distract
him, I sort of had to," Buffy said, not sure why she thought she had
to explain.
Everyone was quiet for a
minute.
"In any case, I’ll play it by
ear. He’ll take the bedroom nearest Dawn and I’ll either stay in
there, or out on the bed with Dawn. Or the couch. Night guys, or
good morning, not sure which to say," Buffy said, "and if I haven’t
said it already, thanks for coming, if you guys hadn’t been there, I
don’t know how I would have gotten Spike out."
Buffy walked back into the
front room. William was just standing there looking out at the
water.
"It’s pretty, isn’t it?" she
asked.
"Yes, it is. I haven’t been to
a lake since my mum used to take us on holiday to The Lake District
when I was a boy.
It was about three hours outside of London by rail, then another
hour by buggy," he said, then stopped and looked at her. "Though my
mind doesn’t know what’s true anymore, so maybe it’s just a dream I
had," he said, sadly.
Buffy didn’t know what to say.
She came up and put her arm around his waist and said, "I’m sure you
remember just fine. Will you tell me about it
sometime?"
He nodded.
Buffy took his hand and led
him to the bedroom, "You should lie down and get some sleep, for
now, okay?"
He nodded again, as she shut
the door to the small bedroom. There was one double sized bed and a
small dresser. An open closet was in the corner.
She drew the blinds, and
pulled back the covers of the bed. William lay down and Buffy pulled
the covers up over him.
"I’m going to go wash up, will
you be okay?" she asked him.
"I think so. Are you…?" he
hesitated.
"Am I what?" she
asked.
"Are you coming back? After
you wash?"
"I will, I’ll come back in a
couple of minutes to check on you," she said, still leaving the
question of where she would sleep unanswered. She wasn’t sure that’s
what he meant anyway.
Buffy walked out into the
kitchen. Willow was out there checking out what was in the
drawers.
"Looks like all we need is
food," she said.
Buffy nodded, then shook her
head, "No, we need clothes, too! Especially William! He only has
what he has on his back. He’s going to need socks, underwear,
pajamas, jeans, t-shirts…gosh everything!"
"I’m sure Dawn and I can pick
him up a few things when we’re out, Buffy. Guess we should get
ourselves some beach things, too, since we’re here, might as well
enjoy it, right?"
Buffy nodded, absent mindedly,
not really caring about that part of the equation, as long as
William was safe.
"You’re right, you and Dawn
should get some things like that."
Dawn came out of the bathroom
and Willow mentioned needing clothes. Dawn’s ears perked up.
"Maybe there’s a mall
someplace close by," she said.
"I don’t know, maybe at least
a K-Mart or Walmart or something like that," Willow said.
Dawn made a face, "Ick, but
I’ll deal. Buffy, I brought you a pair of my pajamas to use," she
said and went to retrieve them.
"I’d forgotten all about that,
thanks."
"Oh, before I forget, what
size jeans does Spike, I mean William wear?"
"30" x 32" she answered
without thinking. She’d more than once over the years looked at the
black jeans and T-shirt that Spike had sent along in the box to
Julian. The last time she’d looked had been a couple of days ago
when she’d packed them into her backpack.
"Medium T-shirts okay?" Dawn
asked?
Buffy nodded, "Medium
everything, I’d say. Better buy some conservative type underwear,
probably boxers rather than briefs. Gah! Who knows what kind of
underwear things they even had back then! Spike never wore…" she
glanced over quickly at Dawn, embarrassed.
"It’s okay, Buffy, we’re all
adults here now, even me."
Buffy rolled her eyes; it was
still embarrassing to talk about those things with Dawn. She wished
she could make the trip to the store with them, but she didn’t dare
leave William alone.
"Maybe a couple of packages of
both boxers and briefs, then he can decide. Oh, and some black
socks, and some white ones, too."
"We’ll figure it out," Willow
said, yawning, "see you in a few hours, Dawn."
"Okay, Willow," Dawn said, and
went off to find her bed, also.
Buffy took about 10 minutes in
the bathroom to clean up and put on the pajamas Dawn had brought
her. She walked through the living room and quietly opened the door
to the bedroom.
He was asleep, lying in the
same position he had been in when she had left. She stood there a
few minutes just looking at him. She desperately wanted to get into
bed herself, if only to fall asleep next to him, but she didn’t dare
risk disturbing him.
With a last glance, she
silently closed the door to the bedroom and decided to lay down on
the couch a couple of feet from the door. She closed her eyes, as
the events of the day ran through her mind, but soon drifted off to
sleep.
An hour later, Buffy was
dreaming of someone knocking at the door, at least that’s what she
thought she was dreaming of, when all of a sudden, she realized that
the knocking that she was hearing was coming from William’s
bedroom.
She jumped up, knocking her
knee on the table next to the couch, before getting to the door. As
she opened it, she saw he lying there, eyes open, curled in a fetal
position, rocking himself and moaning. Every time he did so, his
head was hitting the paneled walls, causing the knocking that she’d
heard.
"William, what is it? What’s
the matter?" she asked in alarm.
He didn’t answer, just
continued to rock, which now seemed to be
increasing.
Buffy got into bed with him
and forcibly got her arms around his shoulder forcing his head away
from the wall, as she pulled him over towards her, "It’s okay
William, I’m here; Elizabeth’s here," she murmured to him, as she
rubbed his back with her other hand.
In a few moments, that seemed
to bring him back to some sort of reality, as his eyes focused on
her for the first time. He closed his eyes for a second, and took in
a shuddering sigh.
"Everything’s alright,
William. I’m here, Elizabeth’s here," she repeated over and
over.
"You left, you said you’d be
back, I…forgot where I was. I’m sorry," he said, feeling like a
pitiful sap.
"I’m so sorry William. I did
come back, but when I saw you had fallen asleep, I didn’t want to
disturb you, didn’t know if you wanted me to…sleep here…you
know…with you."
"I do…if…if you want…to.
Please, Elizabeth…don’t go."
"Buffy? Is everything okay?"
Dawn asked from the other side of the door.
"Yeah, everything’s okay,"
Buffy answered, "go back to sleep, Dawn."
Dawn smiled, flashing back to
all the times she’d heard that growing up!
"I won’t leave you, William. I
promise," Buffy said, as she pulled his head down to her chest, as
his legs straightened out of the curled up position they’d been in,
so that they were now lying, facing each other. She kissed the top
of his head, as her hands stroked his head. Tears ran down her face,
onto his hair, which she quickly wiped away. ‘I’ll never leave you,
again,’ she thought to herself as she fell asleep,
too.
A few hours later it was
William who was awaken to Elizabeth’s nightmares, as she gripped him
tightly in her sleep.
"No! Spike, you’ve done
enough! You can still…please…Spike…can still…don’t leave…love
you…do…love…you…"
"Elizabeth," he shook her
gently, and still, she called out in her sleep.
"Buffy!" he said, taking a
chance on the name her sister and friend called
her.
She opened her eyes, saw his
concerned face close up to hers, "Spike," she whispered as she
pulled his face to hers and kissed him hard.
He hesitated a moment, before
returning her kiss in the same manner. She pulled back after a
moment, as his hesitation brought her back to her senses, "I’m
sorry. William," she softly said, embarrassed.
"S’alright, you were dreaming.
Elizabeth," he said, as he held her close and initiated the next
kiss.
"William," she murmured,
kissing him back.
And so, throughout that first
day, they slept, and comforted, and kissed away each other’s
nightmares.
END CHAPTER
47
CHAPTER 48 - LIKE ANY NORMAL
COUPLE
Every so often throughout the
day, Buffy would awaken to find herself nestled in William's arms or
him in hers. She'd let out a grateful sigh that she wasn't dreaming
and let the still heat of the room, her exhaustion, and relief lull
her to sleep again.
William also awoke throughout
the day, heart pounding in fear, until seconds later, he would also
realize that he was no longer alone and strapped down in that
God-awful hospital room. Instead, he was laying with his arms
wrapped around Elizabeth; a woman he hardly knew, but who somehow,
had miraculously known him and come to save him.
Staring at the top of her
head, or her face, feeling her petite body molded to his, he would
push away all questions for now, just to savor the unbelieving turn
of events. He knew he was lucky, fortunate, and even without Bernie
having said it, he was more grateful to Elizabeth, than he'd been to
any other person in his life. He knew she; this tiny force of
nature, was somehow instrumental in getting so many people
together last night, with the express purpose of getting him out of
the hospital, away from...no, he wouldn't think of it.
And yet she had been shy this
morning, afraid he wouldn't want her to share his bed. As if! She'd
saved him, said they'd been...lovers...whatever that meant...he
wasn't sure. And the way she kissed him! He'd never even known what
it would be like to kiss a woman, wasn't sure he'd know how to do it
properly, but with her...it seemed so natural, as if he'd done it
many times before. Maybe he hadn't forgotten how to kiss, even
though, seemingly, he'd lost all his other memories. Well, at least
that was something, he thought, smiling. He was also aware, that as
he lay there, wrapped up in her arms, that other parts of him seemed
to have their own memories, too. Not that he would ever propose
that, expect that...but still, she made him feel
so...human. So real.
He kissed her softly, and
still asleep, her lips responded to his, as he went back to sleep,
safe for now, in this place, this bedroom; safe in her
arms.
Willow and Dawn each got up
early in the afternoon. Dawn having been awoken by the sounds of
children playing on the beach. She showered, then woke Willow. They
made a list of things they would need in town and got ready to
leave. Dawn slowly opened the door to where her sister and William
were still asleep. She smiled, motioning for Willow to come have a
look. Willow smiled, too seeing them wrapped in each other's arms,
fast asleep.
Dawn quietly closed the
door.
"Like two bugs, snug in a
rug," Willow said.
"Yeah," Dawn said, giggling
like a teenager that she no longer was. She was so glad that Buffy
had found Spike; that she might, for once, get the happiness she
deserved after all that she had sacrificed. For all of
them.
"I'll leave her a note," Dawn
said.
"Meet you outside," Willow
said.
Buffy woke up around 6:00pm,
sweaty from heat and sleep. She heard Willow and Dawn in the
kitchen.
William finally seemed to be
coming around, too.
"Hey," she said softly, still
curled up in his arms, "think maybe we should get up now? Maybe have
something to eat?"
"Okay," he said, staring at
her.
"Come on," she said, and
kissed him once more, a couple of seconds longer than she intended,
as her fingers ran along the stubble of his cheek. Stubble? That was
different! Spike had never had to worry about
shaving.
"Let’s get up and go see what
Dawn and Willow bought."
She started to get up, but he
pulled her back, and smiling shyly, kissed her again, "Not making
the getting up part easy," he said, in his proper British accent
that she was finally getting used to, that is; without thinking of
Giles every time she heard it. A little smile played at the corner
of his eyes.
She smiled back, relieved! It
was the first time 'William' had said anything even slightly
humorous. Of course, given his circumstances, that was to be
expected. She'd almost expected him to add a 'luv' at the end, but
that would have been Spike, not William.
"Feeling better?"
Oh, if she only knew how he
was feeling! Actually, part of it was a bit
painful.
"Yes, I think so."
"We should
probably..."
"Alright."
A few minutes later, they came
out of the bedroom. Her in her sweat soaked pajamas, and William,
wearing the same clothes he had.
"Hi, guys!" Dawn chirped at
them.
"Hey. What smells so
good?"
"I made some stew, I know it's
hot out, but I figured we could all go for a good meal right about
now. Also, there's a salad and some iced tea. Willow bought a picnic
table cover and some plastic and paper goods so we can eat out on
the deck, if that's alright."
"Sure, sounds good. How
long?"
"Till food? About another 45
minutes."
"Time for a
shower?"
"I’d say so," Dawn
answered.
"Oh, William, you probably
want to take a shower, too, don’t you?"
He looked embarrassed, not
used to discussing his bathing habits in front of a woman. In the
hospital, the nurses would take him down the hall to a shower at a
specific time and come back for him at a specific time, but he had
no control of that.
"Um, Buffy, there’s men’s and
a woman’s showers for the campground that you could use. It’s only
down the road about, I don’t know feet; probably 6 trailers between
here and there, so close by. You have to turn the timer on the
outside of the door. That turns the lights on for up to 15 or 20
minutes. There’s privacy doors on each shower.
"Oh, William, I almost
forgot,' she said, motioning to him to follow her, "I hope you don’t
mind, Elizabeth knew you didn’t have anything else besides the
clothes you’re wearing, so we bought you some
stuff."
He looked at two large Walmart
bags on the dining table.
Dawn nodded to him, "The one
on the left is yours, the one on the right is for
Elizabeth."
He pulled out one pair of blue
jeans, one pair of khaki pants, and one pair of nicer black pants.
There was also a Detroit Tiger’s T-shirt, and 4 other T-shirts of
various colors: light blue, tan, black, and gray. Then there were
gray and navy blue, lightweight sweat pants. Dawn figured that would
suit him to sleep in, better than the goofy, checkered pajama
bottoms she saw.
Next, he pulled out a couple
of packages of underwear, which, once he recognized what they were,
shoved them back into the bag. The rest of the bag contained
shampoo, conditioner, a comb and brush, socks, shorts, swim trunks,
No Ad Sunblock #45, a pair of water shoes and sandals, deodorant, a
set of towels for the shower and beach, a shaver, and other personal
items. Lastly, an overnight bag, in which to store them, and a
daypack.
He looked at Dawn, shaking his
head, "I…this is so much here, it must have cost you so much. I
can’t, I don’t think I have any money to pay you," he said, looking
terribly embarrassed.
"William," Buffy said, "you
have money. Don’t worry, when I thought you were…gone…I…don’t worry,
okay? I have; that is, you have money to pay Dawn back. I’ll pay her
back. When we get home, I’ll explain it all to you," she
stammered.
He looked at her
questioningly.
"Really," she nodded, "trust
me, okay."
"Don’t worry, William, I trust
you and Buffy to pay me back," Dawn said, smiling and patting his
arm.
"Then I thank you very much
for having purchased all these things for me, as I appear to be
quite…without, at present," he said, humbly to
Dawn.
Dawn couldn’t believe this man
had once become the swaggering, smirking Spike that she had known.
William was…so different in mannerisms, speech, everything. Yet,
still…there was something about William that reminded Dawn of how
Spike had been, when he’d finally come to live in their basement,
after Buffy had rescued him from The First.
"You’re most welcome, William.
I’m just so glad you’re back with us," she told him and gave him a
quick hug before walking into the kitchen.
"Um, so how do you want to do
this? You can shower here or down at the campground
one."
"Maybe I’ll stay here,"
William answered, though he didn’t fancy being near to the kitchen,
where people might be going about their business, still going to a
public shower, made him much more ill at ease.
"Okay then. I’ll be back in 20
minutes. Do you know need any help with any of these?" she said,
motioning to all the items on the table.
He sort of scowled at her, "I
may have lost my memory, but think I can still read directions," he
said, with as much dignity that he could muster. He picked up a
shampoo bottle. "Lather, rinse, repeat," he
read.
"Well, you really don’t have
to repeat," she said.
"Then why would they say
that?" he asked, innocently.
"I don’t know, it’s just to
get you to use more…" she started, then saw him roll his
eyes.
"Don’t have to get
shirty about it," she said, but with a
smile.
"Not shirty, and besides,
you’re using the word wrong, making a mess of the English language,"
he replied.
"That so? Well, now I think
you are being shirty," she answered, smiling, with a feeling
of déjà vu.
"Okay, I’m off to shower," she
said, breaking out of the deja vu moment and grabbing a handful of
things out of the other Walmart bag.
"Dawn, I’m going. William is
going to shower here," she said, walking through the kitchen to the
front door.
"Okay, Buffy. Wait, let me
show you where it is," she walked outside with Buffy and pointed the
way.
Buffy looked worried, back
toward the cabin.
"Don’t worry, I’ll keep watch
over him. Go ahead, he’ll be fine."
"Yeah, I suppose you’re right.
He does seem to be doing a lot better, doesn't
he?"
Dawn nodded and walked back
into the cabin. She heard him rustling around the
bathroom.
"Everything okay,
William?"
"Fine. Just getting
ready…"
"Okay, just call if you need
anything."
"Thanks."
Dawn stirred the stew, then
went into the living room and sat down on the couch, after hearing
him turn on the shower.
About 15 minutes later, he
emerged from the bathroom, showered, shaved, and wearing a light
blue T-shirt and the khaki pants she’d bought.
"Felt good, huh?" Dawn
asked.
"What?"
"The
shower."
"Oh. Yes, quite nice," he
answered, although uncomfortable discussing such
things.
Dawn started to make another
comment, but noticing this, let it drop.
Buffy came back a few minutes
later from her shower, having changed into a new pair of light
colored jeans and a small, sleeveless, peasant top. Her hair was
loose.
"Where is he?" she asked Dawn,
concerned.
"He just went to put some
things away," Dawn motioned to the bedroom.
She let out a sigh of relief,
going to the door, just as William opened it. They looked at each
other’s new clothes.
"You clean up nice," she said,
smiling at him.
He looked at her
questioningly, then nodded, realizing what she meant. As for him,
he’d never seen her hair down before. He stared at her and at the
tiny top, which showed her belly, before realizing he was doing
so.
"Um, you look nice,
Elizabeth," he said, looking down, shyly.
"Hi," Willow said, coming in
from the deck. She had a bathing suit top on and a towel around her
waist.
"How was the water?" Dawn
asked.
"It was wonderful, nice and
warm. It’s weird getting used to swimming in fresh water, though.
I’m used to swimming in an ocean. This is like swimming in a pool,
almost. Well, at least the no salt part. Is dinner
ready?"
"Yeah, it’s done. Want to help
me get the bowls and stuff?" Dawn asked.
"Sure," Buffy said, still
looking at William.
William was looking at Willow,
shocked at seeing a woman in so little clothing.
"You’re staring," Buffy
whispered to him.
"What? Oh, sorry," he said,
turning to look at Buffy, then walked back in to the bedroom and sat
down on the bed.
"What’s the matter?" Buffy
asked, sitting on the bed next to him.
"Nothing. It’s just…Willow…she
was hardly wearing any…clothes!"
"Oh," she said, understanding
his discomfiture now, "William, it’s quite normal, I mean
now-a-days, we’re at a beach resort, so women and men, they wear
bathing suits and walk around in them quite a
bit."
"I see," he said, trying to
reconcile the old memory he had of old fashioned swimwear, that
almost totally covered up men and women, to what he saw Willow
wearing.
"It’s okay, you’ll get used to
it. Pretty soon, you won’t even think twice about it," she said,
getting up to help Dawn.
He doubted
that!
"Do you want to come out in
the living room or just have us call you when dinner’s
done."
He nodded.
"Okay, I’ll call you then,"
she said, and closed the door, leaving him sitting
there.
Buffy sighed. He’d seemed to
be feeling so much better when she’d gone to take a shower, now he’d
retreated again.
She met Willow on her way out
of the kitchen. She motioned her back in, "Willow, maybe you ought
to put something over your bathing suit top, um, I think you just
freaked William out."
"Huh? OH!" Willow said, her
face blushing.
"Sorry. He’s just not used to
seeing women dressed, well, not dressed, I guess," she said
sheepishly.
"I’m sorry, I totally spaced
before walking in, I should’ve remembered…"
"No, he’ll…he’s going to have
to get used to it, after all, we’re at the beach. I just don’t want
him having a heart attack over dinner," she said,
giggling.
"No, I think we’ll let you
give him that, Buffy!" Willow said, grinning
devilishly.
Buffy blushed, "There were
clothes last night! Lots of clothes, two fully dressed people, in
fact," she stammered.
"Yeah, how long is that going
to last Buffy?" Dawn asked, as she took some bowls down from the
cabinets.
"Indefinitely, I think. Stop,
would you, two? Besides, even if we…I mean, we’re not, but even if,
he still would probably be freaked seeing all the scantily clad
girls about. But he’ll deal. Eventually," she said, hoping she was
right.
They finished setting up the
picnic table on the deck, putting the pot of stew out there, along
with the huge salad bowl, and a pitcher of iced tea.
Buffy went to get William. He
was sitting there, as she’d left him.
"Hungry?"
He nodded.
"Good, come on," she said,
holding out her hand.
He allowed her to take pull
him to her feet, then followed her outside to the
table.
Willow was now dressed in a
top and jeans.
"Evening," William
said.
"Evening," Willow and Dawn
returned.
Buffy, Willow, and Dawn made
small talk around the table about mostly neutral subjects having to
do with school, work, clothes, and food.
"Think we’ll try to barbecue
tomorrow," Willow said, "wish Xander was here, he always did that
stuff.
"Yeah, he did, didn’t he?"
Dawn asked, and brought up the many times he’d cooked out for them
in Sunnydale.
William had been quiet,
listening to them speaking as he ate his stew. He hadn’t been much
for the salad, although he did eat the tomatoes and cucumbers out of
it.
"Is that where you’re from?
Sunnydale?" he asked Willow and Dawn.
"Uh, not anymore. I live near
L.A. and Willow lives in England now."
"Really? You live in England?"
William said, perking up, "Where?"
"In Bath."
"I’ve been there many times.
It’s quite nice. Lovely really."
Buffy listened as they
discussed the university, some of the historic landmarks in the town
itself, as well as some of the surrounding villages and Stonehenge,
not too far away.
"Amazing, how these huge,
ancient rocks came to be placed there, and to be aligned along the
rising of the sun at the midsummer solstice," William
said.
"Yes, but I think there’s some
controversy whether this was because the builders came from a
sun-worshipping culture, or because the circle and its banks were
part of a huge astronomical calendar," Willow
added.
"There always will
be."
Him and Willow shared a laugh,
as Buffy and Dawn looked on. It felt good to hear him laugh and to
participate in conversation.
But she also knew that during
the conversation, he would start to say something like, "Back when I
was there…" then catch himself, just as Willow would stop herself
from asking, "Really?" In other words, try to not confirm or deny
what his memory was, at least, not what year it
was.
Willow had caught herself more
than once, and quickly looked to Buffy with a quick guilty or sorry
expression. Sometimes it was Buffy trying to give Willow a warning
look. William noticed and didn’t quite know what to make of it.
On the one hand, Willow would
be talking to him about the changes in Bath, and the other places,
as if he knew what he was talking about. Then, all of a sudden,
she’d either change the subject, or try to turn it around by saying
something like, "You must really have done a lot of research into
that period of time," or some other such words.
And at times, he would try
himself, not to say words like, "Back when I lived in England…"
instead, he would try to cloak them in more neutral terms like, "I
believe," or "A long time ago," so as to not feel that he was
upsetting Elizabeth. To not remind her that his only memories
seemed to be more than a hundred years out of sync. But he knew…that
the most honest conversation that he’d had with Willow, was when
neither of them was censored in their dialogue, by something he
couldn’t quite understand. It was exhausting.
"William, I forgot, I got a
couple of books for you!" Willow said.
"You did?"
"Yeah, let me go get them,"
Willow said, going back into the cabin.
"We went to Barnes & Nobel
in Niles," Dawn said to Buffy.
"Oh."
"Here," Willow said, coming
back outside and placing a bag in front of him.
He opened it and took out two
books. One was 1000 Inventions & Discoveries by Roger Francis
Bridgman. He turned the back over and read the jacket back to
himself Next he looked at the other book. Technology's Past:
America's Industrial Revolution and the People Who Delivered the
Goods by Dennis Karwatka, and read it also.
"Thought you might like to
catch up, er, jog your memories," Willow said.
"Thank you, Willow," he said,
as he opened the first book and looked in the
index.
"Thanks, Willow," Buffy said,
as well, grateful that at least he'd have some place to start. Some
place, where she wouldn't have to explain
everything.
"Um, Spike, I mean, William,
when you're up to it, I can show you how to find all kinds of stuff
on the computer, too. You can read almost everything about
everything on the Internet. Do research, find out all sorts of
stuff."
He just shook his head. So
much, so much stuff. How could he have forgotten every single thing
he must have ever known?
Buffy looked over at him
worried. He seemed to be getting to the saturation
point.
"I have something for William,
too," Dawn said.
"Nothing like inventions," she
said, seeing the look on Buffy's face. "Be right
back."
She came back a few moments
later and gave him another bag; "Go ahead," she encouraged, seeing
him looking a bit overwhelmed.
He took out the books, the
first was, "An Anthology of Twentieth -Century British & Irish
Poetry." The second was, "The Comedies of William
Shakespeare."
He smiled at those, "Thank
you, Dawn," he said, gratefully.
"You're welcome, I hope you
like them."
"I'm sure I will. Yours, too,
Willow," he quickly added.
Buffy breathed a silent sigh
of relief. At least he would have something pleasurable to read,
something that wouldn't further freak him out.
"Come on, Dawn, let's get the
table cleared," Willow said.
"Sure. Hope dinner was
good."
"Very," he
said.
Buffy and William were alone;
she got up and stood at the railing, looking out at the calm lake,
listening to the soft chatter of the few people on the dock
fishing.
William sat there for a few
minutes looking at the anthology, then sighing, got up to join her.
He wanted to ask her so many things, but was afraid of the answers
that she would give. Or the ones she wouldn’t.
She felt him near her. Not in
the way that she used to be able to sense Spike, but in a way that
she’d begun to sense him after they’d first gone to Julian together.
In a more-than-Spike, but not quite human, sort of way. This was how
she sensed him now, and it confused her. He was clearly William,
clearly human, and yet still…there was something else of him there.
She feared he would ask her
questions that she barely had answers to, and others that she dared
not tell. At least, not yet. Please, don’t let him insist on those
now, she prayed to a God she didn’t even really believe in. Just let
him…be here, with us, adjusting. Was that a word that could describe
what someone, such as William would feel after what he’d just been
through?
"We’re going to the little
store for an ice cream cone before it closes, want to come?" Dawn
asked, popping her head outside.
Buffy looked at Spike,
questioningly.
He looked at her, her eyes
expectant eyes, yet such a simple thing, seemed so
hard.
"Come on, William, it will be
fun," Dawn said.
He
hesitated.
"Dawn, why don’t you and
Willow get us one? What flavors do they have?"
"I don’t know, I’ll run there
and come back and tell you."
"Okay."
A few minutes later, Dawn
appeared in front of the deck, taking the little trail behind the
smaller set of public bathrooms, and around the wooden swing to
rattle off a list.
"I’ll take the strawberry
no-fat," Buffy said.
Dawn snorted, "Figures.
William?"
He chose Rocky Road, after
hearing what it was
They were back about 10
minutes later with the cones.
"Thanks, guys," Buffy told
them.
"How is it?" she asked
William, who was busy licking.
"Umm.
Good."
"Would you like to swing,
while we finish these?"
His heart started pounding for
some reason, though he had no idea why, just the idea of leaving the
confines of the deck, even though the swing was only 25 feet away.
He looked at Elizabeth. She must think him the biggest Nancy-boy of
all time.
He gave a nod, which made her
smile. She took his hand and led him off the deck. They walked over
toward the chair. Their neighbors in cabin 1, sitting outside in
front of their fire, called out a greeting to them. Buffy answered
for them, but they both waved.
They sat down on the swing,
enjoying the rest of their cones, while a person in cabin one, had
brought a fiddle outside and started to play an Irish folk
song.
William smiled, hearing it, "I
know that song," he said.
"Name-y?"
He smiled at her funny speech,
"I don’t remember, but I’ve heard it played
before."
Sitting to his right, she took
his hand, as his left was busy with the cone. She’d almost forgotten
he was left-handed. Didn’t they say that left-handed people were
artistic? Thought with different sides of their brains about things
that right-handed people thought with she wondered, thinking of the
poetry and paintings he’d done. Sensitive, too. Probably why she’d
fallen for the only sensitive vampire in the world. Well, one of the
only ones, she thought letting her thoughts go dark to Angel, for a
minute.
William let go of her hand,
and taking a chance, moved closer and put his arm around her
shoulders, instead.
She took a breath, and leaned
into him, resting her head against his shoulder.
They sat there like that for
the next hour, just swinging, not talking. Anybody looking at them
would think they were like any normal couple, having a normal
evening, in the midst of a normal life.
END CHAPTER
48
CHAPTER 49 - A HAPPY SLUMBER
They both had new pajamas to
sleep in. Buffy in a cute, short, sleeveless nightgown, William wore
his blue sweat pants and the Detroit Tigers T-shirt. Willow had
bought them all window fans, which she’d put in their window while
they were still on the swing.
That night there was no
question about if she would share his bed. He’d gotten ready for
bed, while she washed up. She said goodnight to Dawn and Willow and
went into the bedroom.
He looked at her as she came
in. She almost took his breath away, as he looked at her in the
little nightgown.
Buffy was aware of his eyes
following her, as she put a couple of things away. She didn’t know
why she all of a sudden felt shy, but she did.
She turned off the lamp.
William was lying on his back, as she lay down, he put his arm out a
little, inviting her into them. She turned on her side, putting her
arm around his chest, as he drew her near. His hand came up around
her back, sending the most delicate shivers down her spine. His
other hand played in her hair. She raised her hand from his chest to
trace that face that she’d never forgotten the feeling of.
Turning over on his side to
face her, he studied her face in the moonlight coming through the
blinds. Was she real? Never in his most ardent wishes, when he’d
been the most alone, nor even in his innermost heart, had he even
dared to wish for a woman such as her to love.
Are you real? His questioning
eyes asked.
She looked at him, as her
fingertips lightly traced his cheek, his ear, his mouth. He may be
William, but they way he was looking at her…it was enough to make
her almost want to run from the purity of his gaze. She remembered
Spike always looking at her with such adoration that she’d wanted to
hide, to run, for surely, she hadn’t deserved such a thing. She
wasn’t sure that she did now, either.
Are you? Her questioning eyes
asked in turn.
"Elizabeth,
may…I?"
"May you what,
William?"
"May I reacquaint myself with
your…lips?"
She smiled at his very proper
Victorian-type of question.
"May you kiss
me?"
He nodded.
"Yes."
He leaned in, kissing her
softly. She responded back, as he slowly, languidly kissed her in
the sweetest of ways, even when the pressure of their kisses
increased.
"Don’t have to…" she said
between kisses.
"Don’t have to
what?"
"You don’t have to ask,
William."
He kissed her harder then, as
they held each other tightly. She put her hands underneath the back
of his T-shirt so she could feel his skin and heard him gasp in
pleasure as she massaged his back from his shoulders to the small of
his back. She wished she’d worn pajamas, instead of a nightgown, so
he could do the same, yet at the same time, she was happily floating
in a state of arousal that she’d never experienced quite like it
before.
Suddenly, he pulled her over
on top of him, so that there was now full body contact between them,
her lovebird necklace coming to rest on his chest. She looked down
at him, eyes glazed over, as his wore a look of shock, at what he’d
just done.
He lay still, letting her make
the next move. It was painfully obvious that he was both embarrassed
and aroused.
Closing her eyes, she kissed
his mouth, his neck, his ear, as she firmly pushed her body down on
his. He responded by raising his up, as he kissed her back, kissed
her neck in a spot that made her moan. Their bodies rocked against
each other’s in a motion as ancient as time.
His lips found hers again, as
they rubbed against each other. He stopped moving, when she didn’t
think she could, and kissed her softly again, letting them both
catch their breath. She lay with her head on his chest,
concentrating on calming down, as his hands rubbed her
back.
Just as they were calm again,
she lifted her head off his chest and found his mouth again. Moments
later, once again, they rocked against each other, his hands this
time, on the sides of her hips, moving her to his rhythm, as they
both moaned.
Buffy touched his lips with
her tongue, and found his nearby. Passions deepened as William
discovered a new way to kiss.
Again, they stopped the dance;
she rolled off of him this time, collapsing onto her side. She’d
never experienced being so consumed with kissing and fire, yet at
the same time, somehow, knowing that they wouldn’t be making love
just yet. There was some a kind of unbridled joy in it, strange as
it may seem, for a woman, whose only experiences with this sort of
passion, had always led to consummation, whether love or just lust
was involved.
This was some sort of
delicious dance that they were doing. A discovering, a
rediscovering.
William lay there, painfully
aroused still, trying to get his breathing under control. If she
hadn’t moved that moment, he’s sure he would have made a mess right
on himself. Or worse, on her. He wanted to touch every square inch
of her, wanted to taste and to love every inch of her. He cast a
sidelong glance at her, snuggled up to his side, her arm over him.
She sent his mind spinning. The feeling of her body on his…moving
with his…
"You okay?" she asked,
laughing softly, "no, don’t answer that!"
"You’re beautiful," he said,
turning to look at her.
"How do you do
that?"
"What?"
"Make me feel…so
much?"
"Do I?"
"You do," she said,
happily.
"You do, too," he said,
hugging her to him, as they both drifted off to a happy
slumber.
END CHAPTER
49
CHAPTER 50 - SOME KISSES, SPELLS, &
GOOGLE
Buffy awoke to being kissed by
William. In her half-asleep state, she'd almost thought herself back
in Julian, thought it was Spike kissing her and responded in kind,
for a moment, abandoning the reserve she held herself in, while with
William. She pulled his shirt off and was about to divest herself of
her nightgown when she opened her eyes and saw the almost shocked
face of William staring at her in awe. Deftly, she pulled the bottom
of her nightgown back into place.
"I didn't this time," he said,
smoothing her hair.
"Didn't what?"
"Didn't ask. To kiss you."
"I'm glad," Buffy said, as they kissed
again, him pulling her over on top him.
As if hours of sleep had not been in
between their last 'session' once again, they moved with each other,
kissing tenderly, then not so much. Kissing, panting, moaning,
stopping, and starting - over and over again, until a couple of
hours had passed into mid-morning.
"Have to..." Buffy said, finally,
between kisses, "get up."
"Why?" William asked, "want to stay
this way with you forever."
"Don't think it would last like this
forever," she said, kissing him, grinding down on him.
"Oh, God, Elizabeth," he
gasped.
Finally, they broke apart and seeing
an opportunity, she made a dash for the bathroom, sanity, and some
coffee. William tried to grab her, then stuck out his lower lip in a
rather, in a rather cute boy-like pout, "Come back."
"No, got to get up. You, too," she
said, blowing him a kiss at the door.
God, what she did to him! He thought
of her, of his body under hers, he let out a soft groan, as his hand
slipped under the waistband of his sweatpants...
"Morning," Buffy said, as she hurried
past Dawn and Willow on her way to the bathroom.
"Morning," they returned, looking at
each other with knowing looks. Dawn had been woken from her sleep to
hear her sister moaning. At first she thought something was the
matter, but on further inspection. Well, ear to their door, she got
the picture. She didn't know what was with her hearing; if it had
something to do with having been 'The Key,' formerly, but she always
seemed to have the most acute hearing. Not that Buffy was aware she
was being heard.
"I'll be back in a few minutes,"
Willow said, heading over to the little store to buy some more
eggs.
Buffy came out of the bathroom, and
poured herself some sugar into her coffee cup and began to put it to
her mouth, when she realized she hadn't yet poured the coffee.
Quickly, she dumped out the sugar and decided to go for the coffee
by itself, black.
"How are you Buffy?" Dawn asked,
smiling innocently, "sleep well?"
"Um hmm," she said, absentmindedly,
trying to not think of his kisses, the way they were
affecting her or of how utterly satisfying and delicious they were.
That is, if she ignored that they kept her thinking about them,
about him, in a constant state of desire.
"Um hmm," she repeated, as if she
hadn't already answered the question.
"Okay, Buffy, spill!"
"Huh?" Buffy asked, looking at Dawn
for the first time.
"You two, what's going on?"
"Us two? Nothing. Nothing's going on,"
she quickly answered.
"Then what's all that moaning I heard
coming from your bedroom this morning, huh?"
"Oh, God! You heard?"
"Oh, yes," Dawn answered
smugly.
"It's not what you think, not what it
sounds like," she added, lamely.
Dawn just looked at her, eyebrows
raised.
Buffy lowered her voice; "It's still
clothes on. Really. Just...a lot of kissing."
"Seriously? Kissing only? All that
moaning coming from kissing?"
"Well, a little bit of friction, too,"
Buffy said, blushing.
"But still, must be SOME
kissing!"
"Yeah. It is. Some kind of SOME
kissing," she said, getting that glassy-eyed, far-away look again,
as she remembered.
Just then William came out of the
bedroom, dressed in blue jeans and the gray T-shirt.
"Morning, William," Dawn said, then
mouthed to Buffy, 'sleep well?' to which Buffy gave her a warning
look.
"Morning," he said, unaware of the
interchange between Dawn and Elizabeth.
"Hey, William," Willow came in from
the outside, "sleep well?"
Buffy and Dawn started
giggling.
"Yes. Fine. Thank you," he said,
perplexed at hearing the giggling.
On the other side of the bathroom
door, he stiffened, all of a sudden thinking back to a party, well,
really many soirees, where women, upon him either entering or
leaving, would laugh. Laugh when they either thought they couldn't
be heard, or didn't care if they were. At him. About him. But this
was Elizabeth; she couldn't be laughing at him. She just couldn't.
Still, the part of him, the lifelong, insecure part, was hurt by the
possibility. So, when he came out, he avoided her eyes. He just
didn't dare chance to see some sort of scorn in them.
Dawn was making eggs and William,
oddly enough, was staying in the kitchen with her. Buffy looked out
at the deck, only to be motioned outside by Willow.
"Hey, Will, how's it
going?"
"Listen, Buffy, before William comes
out, I've got to show you something."
"What is it?" Buffy said, a feeling of
dread, suddenly overtaking her.
"I bought the South Bend newspaper,
just to have something to read, and I saw this," she said, handing
Buffy the paper.
From the AP Wire:
Date: Friday June 13, 2008
A small Cessna
plane went down over the Rocky Mountains on early Saturday morning.
Before it crashed, the pilot radioed that he was being attacked by a
mental patient that was being escorted by two 'interns' to Los
Angeles, destination unknown.
It is believed that the other two men
were killed first, before the mental patient turned his attentions
on the pilot.
The patient identified as Mark Mason,
a convicted mass murderer, escaped from the hospital, with the help
of two men, posing as interns. It is also suspected that a Dr.
Dimitri Polydefkis, who before the escape, chloroformed and locked
two nurses in a utility closet, was an accomplice, it was reported
in The University of Chicago press release.
Dr. Polydefkis still remains at
large.
Buffy had turned pale, as she handed
the paper back to Willow.
"You were right, Buffy, they were
trying to get William out of there the other night."
"You mean Angel," she said, bitterly.
"And I guess your spell worked, too."
She stared at Willow.
"Guess that's something," she said, "I
didn't know people would die."
"How could you?" Buffy said,
comforting her friend, who was obviously conflicted. "The pilot
probably worked for Wolfram & Hart, too."
"Probably."
Buffy looked up again, "He's going to
know that they didn't get the right person. That it wasn't William
in that plane."
"I know. I've been thinking about
that. I...I think there's something I can do, I just have to call
Athenea and ask her something."
"A spell?"
"Yes, a couple of them really."
"Is it safe?"
"Yes, it will protect William and his
identity. And you."
"I meant is it safe for you, Willow?"
"Yeah, it will be safe for me," she
said, smiling at her friends concern.
"Good then. Do what you have to
do."
"I will. Right after breakfast," she
said, as Dawn and William carried out a big platter of eggs and the
coffeepot.
After breakfast, Willow went out to
find an area, where her digital phone could get a decent signal, and
William helped Elizabeth clear the table. He had been quiet during
breakfast, not making much eye contact with her. As he put down the
dishes, she turned to him.
"What's wrong?"
"Nothing. Why do you ask?"
"Well, for one thing, you haven't
looked at me once since you came out of the bathroom."
He looked at her, saw the concern in
her face and something else. Hurt.
He melted.
"I just...I heard you and Dawn
laughing and I thought it was...I thought you were laughing
at...me."
"Why? Why would we laugh at you? Why
would I?"
"Wouldn't be the first time a lady
laughed at me," he mumbled.
As she tried to remember, it came to
her. They had been laughing, when Willow asked him if he'd slept
well. "Oh," she said, lowering her voice, "Dawn heard us, well,
heard me moaning this morning. She asked me all innocent like how
I'd slept, then grilled me. So it was sort of a joke between us. But
not at you, honestly."
"What did you say?" he asked stiffly,
part fear, part embarrassment.
Buffy put her arms around him and
whispered in his ear, "I told her you had the most lovely kisses
that I'd ever had, and that's why I moaned, because they were so
delicious and satisfying."
He looked at her, eyes wide, partly in
wonder, partly in gratitude. "You said that?"
"I did. It's the truth," she said, and
kissed him, right in the middle of the kitchen, just as Dawn walked
in.
"Sheesh, you two, get a
room!"
Buffy giggled and William turned
red.
"Dawn, didn't I tell you that William
was a great kisser?"
"Yeah, Buffy, you did," she said,
rolling her eyes, "but you don't have to give a
demonstration!"
Later on, Buffy was sitting next to
William on the couch, as he looked at the books that Willow had
brought. He kept putting the books out at arm’s length. She smiled
in understanding and got up. She dug around in her purse for a
minute, and came back and held something out to him.
"Here, try these," she said, offering
him a pair of store bought reading glasses, that she'd started using
this past year when she started teaching.
He put them on and then picked up the
book, smiling.
"Better?"
"Yes. Thank you."
She was only glad that she hadn't
picked out the flowered ones. These were just plain, no-rim glasses.
Maybe back in California, she'd take him to an eye doctor.
For the next hour, they sat on the
couch as he read in amazement some of the inventions of the past
100+ years. She tried to read them too, over his shoulder, but
squinted, now that he had her glasses, so he would read aloud a
particular passage to her, when she’d ask him about something. Most
of the inventions, she didn’t even remember the dates of, having
just taken everything for granted. She wondered how it would be to
wake up 100 years from now, how things would be all different.
She noticed a couple of times, tears
seemed to come to his eyes, whether it was in amazement, or being
overwhelmed, she didn’t know. Probably both.
"Why don’t I know all this?" Why can’t
I remember all this?" he would ask her, pained.
"I don’t know," she would answer. That
was partly the truth. She didn’t know why he he’d come back with
only William’s memories, instead of Spike’s.
"It’s okay," she’d tell him, patting
his leg in reassurance.
He just shook his head. Finally, she
took the book from him. "I think that’s enough for now, don’t
you?"
"There’s so much I need to know," he
told her, trying to open up the book again.
"I know. I know, but you don’t have to
memorize, learn, or even understand it all in one day. Rome wasn’t
built in a day, and neither will your understanding, your education
of all this. I don’t want you to try to do too much, too
soon."
"But I have to know. I have
to."
"I know. But not all at once," she
insisted.
He sighed and reluctantly gave her
back her reading glasses.
"I’ll put these on the dresser, so we
can both use them," she said.
"Men on the moon?"
"Yeah, but not for a while
now."
"Why?"
"Too much money, I think."
"It shouldn’t matter. 40 years ago
they landed on the moon then didn’t go on to other planets? That’s
absurd! Obscene!"
"You’re right. And very astute," she
told him, smiling.
He didn’t say anything for a couple of
minutes.
"Cloning?"
"Yeah, not the easiest thing to do, I
guess."
"Would you?"
"What?"
"Make a copy of yourself or someone
else you loved?"
"Not of me, but…well…even if I did, it
wouldn’t be like I could give them the same environment, that the
original had, so they would genetically be the same, but they’d
still be different. There’s a nature versus nurture
argument."
He looked puzzled.
"You know, what exerts the most
influence the environment or one’s genes, one’s own inherent
nature," she said, clarifying.
He nodded, thinking, "Both, I’d
say."
"Exactly! Maybe if I’d just lost a
baby…because it would still be a baby and hadn’t had much time to be
in an environment I would want to do it, but I guess that even then,
you’d want to replicate the internal environment exactly. Or maybe
not, if I’d just lost it," she said, thinking about it in a
philosophical way, although the fact that she’d even used the word
baby gave her pause. It was something that she tried
never, ever to think about, and all of a sudden it slipped
out.
"Sort of like me.’
"What? A baby? You’re not…"
"I’m like a clone. I’m the same, but
I’m different," he said sadly.
"William," she said, not knowing what
else to say, "it’ll be okay. You’ll be okay. We’ll be okay,
too."
He put his head on her shoulder for a
few moments. How would he be okay without his memory? With only
false ones? They didn’t seem false, but then, they had to be, what
else could they be?
The first thing he’d looked for in the
book, when Elizabeth had left him for a few minutes had been on
aging. He thought perhaps there had been some sort of miracle
medicine developed to keep people looking young for a century.
Perhaps it had been some sort of fluke of medicine from the 1870’s
or 1880’s. But if they’d had it then, wouldn’t everyone have wanted
it? Maybe the ingredients had been lost; the person who invented it
killed. He thought, perhaps that had been his secret; and when he’d
met Elizabeth! He just didn’t tell her he was over 100 years old,
because judging by what he looked like to himself in the mirror, he
was late 20’s at most. What if he was keeping that a secret
from her? He’d found some way to keep looking young and he was
really an old man?
Then, he reasoned, he’d lost his
memory, except for the first 20+ years. But that didn’t make sense.
Alas, he’d read that the average age for both men and women was now
into their mid- late 70’s. That alone was shocking! He remembered
that if someone made it to their middle 50’s, they were doing quite
well. Still, he could find nothing on miracle medicine, past or
present. No miracle drug to make one looking young, being young.
"I think…I think I’m going to lay down
a while. I’ve seemed to developed a headache," William said, getting
up, when she’d come back into the living room.
"I can understand why," she said,
pointing to the book. "I’ll bring you some aspirin."
"Alright," he said. He’d learned all
about aspirin and the uncomfortable art of taking pills in the
hospital.
She came into the bedroom a few
minutes later. He was lying there on top of the covers staring at
the ceiling.
"Here, take these," she said, holding
out a couple of aspirin and a bottle of water to him.
He sighed, propping himself up on his
elbows in order to take them, then laid back down.
Concerned, she put her hands on his
head and gently massaged his scalp and temples.
He gave into the feeling and closed
his eyes.
A few minutes later, she got up to
leave.
"Do you have to go?" he asked, opening
his eyes.
"I’m sorry, I want to stay, but I need
to talk to Willow about some things. You try to take a little nap
now, okay? I’ll be back in about an hour. Promise. If you’re still
in bed, then I’ll come lay down with you."
"Okay. Don’t ask."
"What?"
"You know," he said, with a shy
smile.
She smiled back, "I won’t," she said,
and kissed him then before she left.
Dawn was coming out of the bathroom
with her swimsuit on, when Buffy came into the kitchen.
"Oh, Dawn, were you just going to the
beach?"
"Yeah, is that okay?"
"Could you do me a favor? Could you
stay in the cabin with William for a while?"
"Sure, where is he?"
"Laying down, he had a headache.
Nothing serious, just on overload from Willow’s invention books, I
think."
"Sure, where are you
going?"
"I have to talk to Willow. Did she
show you the article?"
Dawn nodded, "Yes, I saw it. And I
also threw it away so he didn’t."
"Thanks, next thing I was going to
say."
"Okay, no problem, I’ll be here," she
said, flopping down on the couch with her laptop.
"Thanks, Dawn."
Dawn waved to Buffy as she went out
the sliding door to the deck and to find Willow.
She saw Willow sitting on the dock and
went to join her.
"Did you get in touch with Athenea?"
Buffy asked.
"Yes, and she agreed with what I was
thinking."
"Which was?"
"That the first thing I have to do is
to erase everyone’s memory and all paper traces of William
Worthington from the past few weeks. From the time that William was
found in the museum and all of his time spent in the
hospital."
"That way," Willow continued, "nobody
will be able to look over his records, including any thugs that
Angel might send."
"I’m sure he will be, if he hasn’t
already. Bastard," she swore under her breath, "How could he do this
to me? To Spike?"
"He’s jealous; of both of you. Spike
for the Shanshu that he assumed was going to be his, and you…well,
because you love Spike."
"Yeah, except he’s not really Spike
anymore," she said, giving voice to what she knew now to be true. "I
don’t know if he ever will be. Do you think he will?"
"Um, I don’t know. What if he’s not
Buffy? Have you thought of that? I mean about your feelings for
him?"
"What do you mean, my feelings, he’s
still, I mean Spike still had William inside him and I loved him.
Them. Ug!" she sighed, her own head hurt now.
"But William doesn’t seem to be any of
what Spike was," Willow said, gently.
"Of course he is, because Spike had
William inside him, I mean…" she looked at Willow. "I don’t know
what I mean, but I care. No. I love William, too. I loved him when I
knew him before, at least the parts I got to see in Spike, so
there’s just more of William to love now, right?"
"I guess so," Willow answered, heavy
with new knowledge, she’d just gotten about the prophecy which she
couldn’t share, lest it be interfered with or changed somehow.
They sat for a while, just looking out
at the water, watching a person put up a dive flag and go
snorkeling, watched as a couple of paddleboats took off with happy
peddlers.
What if William was never Spike? Never
remembered his life as Spike, how he’d felt about her. Did it
matter? He seemed to be quite into her right now. Was he
remembering, somewhere inside him, the love they’d shared? Or, just
as William, discovering what it was like to be a man with a woman?
Why did Willow have to ask such difficult questions when she was
happy being in the land of De Nile, at least for now?
Shaking the tough questions out of her
head, she turned to Willow. "You can erase what? Newspapers?
Hospital records? Police reports? All the memories of everybody who
ever dealt with William or me?"
"Yes."
"What about Dr. Turner? And Leroy and
Bernie?" she asked.
"What are you asking me?"
"It’s just that…well, I thought that
maybe William would want to speak to Dr. Turner if he had any
questions or felt too stressed. You know? Maybe even I
would."
Willow thought about it for a minute.
"I can do a special spell on them, so that upon hearing your voice
or William’s that they remember everything, but the minute that they
aren’t, then they will be unable to remember anything about either
of you two. Unless they need to mail you something or something like
that. But if Angel was to capture them, torture them, or more
benignly, hook them up to a lie detector, even then, they wouldn’t
know a thing and it would be ‘technically’ the truth."
"Is it safe for you, for
them?"
"Yes, I’ve got the power of the coven
behind me on this, so not a problem."
"There’s another spell I need to do,
one involving you and William."
"What is it?"
"I need to do a protection spell over
you and William, in particular, so that he can’t be hurt by any
supernatural forces. Or any forces hired by the supernatural, like
Angel did in hiring Dr. Polydefkis."
"That would be good, won’t it? That
he’ll be protected?" she let out a sigh of relief.
"Yes, you, too. But it won’t
protect you or him from being hit by a car or anything like that, "
she said, but to herself thought, ‘or from the rest of the
prophecy that might turn out one way or the
other.’
